Saturday, June 21, 2008

Brooklyn Omnivores Unite!

Is it just me or are these insipid newcomers to our Brooklyn neighborhoods trying to force their lifestyles down our throats? Case in point - those dastardly hipster vegetarians and their veggie agenda! Or as I call it, their 'veg-enda' (copyright pending).

Now I'm all about live and let live (behind closed doors), but...


Every day our omniverous rights are being usurped by the slithering vegetarian mafia. Unlike more visible marginalized groups, the veggies don't demand to be accommodated - they already expect it!

I was at Hanley's last night, and I overheard one veggie complaining that the last remaining veggie-friendly dish (the mac & cheese) had been recently upgraded to mac & cheese & ham! Well, for us regular folk, it's a victory! Sure, I never asked for it, but add ham to anything and it's automatically better. But the veggies want to take away our omni right to eat mac & cheese with ham.

I applaud Hanley's for taking a stance against the veg-enda, and I will most certainly be meating it up in their garden much more now that I know that I won't end up sitting next to some bearded veggie. It's time we take back out borough from these malnourished know-it-alls - one restaurant at a time!!


Nillabb said...

As a vegetarian I'd like to take back grammar from the know it alls. "take back out burough?" Get a life.

mod squad said...

Nillabb, you need to eat some animal protein before you become completely retarded.

kane said...

Nillabb, like most vegetarians, you are one anal retentive perfectionist--surely you've heard of typos.